17°73.330' S x 168°32.731' E
December 4th, 2019
1400
Not did I truly believe we were leaving until the anchor was up and the last of Vanuatu disappeared into the horizon behind us. Didn't know exactly where we were headed, but honestly didn't care. Captain and the wind were to have a chat and make up their minds. New Zealand was the end destination but a stop at New Caledonia to await for a good opening to jut across was not unlikely. Australia and even Solomon Islands were not entirely off the table either. The crew was ecstatic to finally be out of the break water and into the big seas. Oh boy it felt good. Captain directed us to 'sail off the hook', which was a first for me. This means to get underway without the help of the engine. So we had half the crew pulling up the last of the anchor while the others timely hoisted the sails to steer us out of beautiful Millie Bay. Waving goodbye to Vanuatu the ocean quickly swallowed us into her wild pitching and rolling sea, making the entry into the journey rough for the bellies of almost the entire crew. Feeling the swell for the first time felt like a welcome home hug. Every part of me is so happy to be back at sea. I love the feeling in my chest as we rise high over one swell and dive down the next. My legs are happy to be at different lengths again, always bending one depending which way we're leaning so I can be standing up straight. My hips have already caught and braced me multiple times walking around and I will no doubt be well bruised in a few days time. My hands are raw and blistered and will soon become firm and calloused. Not that I really wore shoes in Vanuatu anyways - but my feet are now happy to know the wooden deck and nothing else. "But you - you feel God's pleasure in your bones when you sail." - observation from beloved mom. I really do. There is something so magic to me about being out in our beautiful sea. And here I am, off on a 1300 nautical mile voyage.
18°33.794' S x 167°14.366' E
December 6 - Day 2 at sea
1036
Settling into our new lives at sea, each adjusting to our new sleep schedules. I love watch systems so much. I love waking up at weird hours. I love being surrounded by only a few people consistently. I love slowly seeing people emerge from their deep rudely awakened sleeps and getting them coffee stat. I love standing for one hour at the helm steering. I love adjusting sails. I love learning tricks of the trade, like feeling the wind properly behind your ears or sailing by a star. Right now we're sailing full and by, which means we're trying to stay as close to the wind but with the sails still full. We're on a port side tack and we're heading due west to New Caledonia. I am on the 8-12 watch along with Rob, Raven and Cookie. I like my watch mates a lot. Raven woke me up for watch last night and it was such a shocking experience. I had only gone to sleep an hour before so I was just thinking I was to take a little light nap or something.. but I felt like being drawn out of where ever I was in my far far away dream and back onto this crazy boat in Vanuatu was the biggest trip ever. It took me so long to register where I was. She shook me awake and after multiple tries I sat up in my bed gasping thinking NO WAY my dream wasn't real life but THIS is actually real life? Holy crap it was so shocking. I still can't get over it. I came up on deck and tried to take in the stars and the sea and the fact that there was no land around me and just felt so shocked that this was actually my reality. Well, good morning I guess. I sat my bum down on the aft deck where we remain for our watch. Raven took the first hour on the helm. I stared at the stars and felt so grateful to be out here.
December 7, Day 3 at sea
0010
Just crawled into my bunk after a gorgeous warm 4 hours under the stars. I love being places warm enough to wear a bikini or shorts at night. My belly ain't doing so hot. I've had diarrhea 9 times today. Like bad diarrhea. And I mean, I'm used to diarrhea, I know it well. This is something else. Also stepping down and ducking my head to crawl into this tiny outhouse on deck is extra rough. Especially while it's rocking back and forth while heeling over 30 degrees. If you think this is too much information friends, feel free to try taking a shit while on a rollercoaster then get back to me. You'll be sympathetic.
19°00.217' S x 166°66.731' E
heading 230°
0724
warm, sunny, clear skies
This morning is beautiful. The waters are calm and have a nice slow roll to them. Unlike the random thrashing and rolling they have been the last days. Other than my very upset stomach, I am pretty happy. I get to play all day in the sun, I love my watch mates, we have a rad supply of fruit and veg, and (eeep!) I have a handsome boy meeting me in New Zealand to look forward to. Life is peachy.
December 8
0112
Day 3 at sea? or 4?
I am currently laying on deck writing letters and looking at the stars. I just saw an unbelievable shooting star. There's really nothing like a clear sky at sea. I love looking at the 7 sisters constellation. I know they're not navigational stars but they captivate me. Note to self: get more thought provoking/ self discovery books for the next passage. It's nice to feel like I'm reading things that guide me to grow and bloom and discover myself more. Reading Master and Commander is fun, but it's almost too similar to my current days to really enjoy. Tonight Esava caught 2 fish! We'll cook them up in the morning. Tuna too - just my luck. As if we haven't been eating enough canned tuna already. Nah I actually like fresh tuna though. And I love fish for breakfast! I can hear Liam down in the galley now making bread to go with it. During my watch I went through the galley and did a rotation of all the fresh fruit, I was so bummed to find so much of it already bad. I sat down there with my headlamp and ate almost an entire moldy paw paw with a spoon. No wonder I have diarrhea. I set aside a good amount of the fruit going bad on the counter for Mele to find. Hopefully she'll make a big fruit salad to go with breakfast. I guess because everything we bought in Vanuatu from the market is unsprayed, it's lifespan is pretty short. Ya win some ya lose some. I've started doing 10 pushups per hour during my watches, just as a nice way to keep moving at least a tiny bit. Seeing my step counter per day on my period app is literally hilarious. Today was 197 HAHA. Not that I usually have my phone on me so it's probably more - but still. Cardio is not a thing at all out here.
Today was interesting. And rough. - As I copy this blog almost entirely word for word from my journal, it's hard to know how much to say and how much to keep. I'll carry on tenderly. - While raising the sails today one of the crew was frustrated with Sahara not understanding exactly which line to pull on, and when she asked again which one, they showed her in a rough and unkind way. She fled to the safety of her bunk and wept. If only I was there to witness it. When I heard about it later I ran to her bunk and found her, feeling scared and small. I asked her if I could bring it to captain and talk about it. Truth is, as I sit here writing this, I keep debating erasing this all and not mentioning a word about it. Feels awkward to write. Feels embarrassing if the person were to ever read this. But truth is, crossing the line is awkward. Hurting people is embarrassing. And I'm tired of carrying that awkwardness myself. If I can't be loud and stomp my foot when people hurt me or my friends, how will any of us grow? How will things change? How can we create safe spaces if things go unmentioned? How can she feel safe if they think they can do that again? Let's just say I stomped my foot real hard. I was passionate until hot tears ran down my cheeks and I demanded they were seen. We always need to feel safe asking for help. I've been a firm advocate of that on this ship especially. Where formal training is non existent and not everyone has the same level of experience. It's days like this where I'm reminded sailing can be a very extreme workplace and friction between crew is unavoidable. It's not surprising when voices are raised and frustrations are felt. The hard part is having no escape. You can't just go get a beer after a rough day at work. Your constantly on. Your workplace is your home, and your co workers are your family. Or undoubtably worse, if they aren't your family - they're annoying acquaintances living in your home lol. God help me stand up for Sahara. For myself. For the girls onboard. For the men. It's ridiculous to let anyone get pushed around by someone. We are all equal. We all deserve to be treated fairly and appropriately. And we all deserve to have someone standing up for us when this doesn't happen. Help me be wise and gentle yet fierce and courageous and unafraid. I love you God. I love believing in you. I love that you speak to me and delight in me. Help me delight in everyone onboard. Help me see them and ask their stories. Help me be reliable and honest. It's crazy how quick the clouds can roll in and swallow all the stars. I'm going to go crawl into my bunk now.
1020
We're arrived to the waters of New Caledonia! I spotted it first on my watch. It's fun - I'm almost always the first one to spot a new ship or land or even a tiny cockroach crawling lol. Wether we check in or not is still yet to be determined. We are sailing right through a chain of islands. The land looks so weird. Barren and empty. Today is also my sweet momma's birthday! Captain was good enough to let me call her on our satellite phone. I got carried away and made it 3 minutes instead of 1 haha. I am so grateful to have heard her voice and told her that I am well and I love her. She is so freaking valuable to me. God thank you SO much for her. Thank you for her love and constant affection and support in my life. It's so much fun to be best friends with your mom.
22°08.959' S, 168°13.585' E
130°
1532
I saw the sunrise for the first time today. Sahara came down to get me at 0440 because Captain wanted to see if my phone had service, being so close to New Cal. We were hoping to get onto Predict Wind to get a weather forecast. Seem's crazy to me that we don't have a way of getting that ourselves at sea. No service though. The sky was a playful baby pink and blue. Clouds shaped like a kindergartener would have drawn them. The air felt warm and sweet. I miss the sunrise and sunsets. I will be grateful to switch to the 4-8 on another passage, it's my favourite watch by far. Cookie pulled up a nice big Mahi on our morning watch! I helped him fillet it. Mele made the most tasty dish with the raw mahi, lemon, mayo, carrots and spices. We also had honey stir fried veg, spicy pineapple salsa and fresh rolls. I'm in heaven. Pierce burnt his foot welding and it's getting quite infected. It's pretty scary, watching it swell more and more every day. He's taking some antibiotics now.. lord have mercy. Today Cap finally decided we'll be heading straight to NZ and not clearing into New Cal. I am thankful, Nate is arriving on the 24th and I don't want to miss a single day with him. Opua is 800 nautical miles away. Captain says we'll be there in 8 days. I'm putting money on 16.
22° 17.52' S x 168°21.09' E
130°
1930
Just woke up completely exhausted in my bunk. Unable to muster the strength to even get up. Was completely covered in sweat. I had to go to the bathroom so bad but I literally couldn't get up LOL finally I started talking to myself and pepping the big move. Put on your shirt Ella. Thats it. Put on some shorts. Climb upstairs. I waddled drunkly to the aft. Sahara was standing at the helm and burst out laughing at my exhausted presence. I'm sure I looked crazy. She said the first words she heard from my mouth were so deep. This is hilarious. I told her about my struggle getting out of bed and we had a good laugh. Being at sea can often make me so lethargic. Also this extremely bad diarrhea wasn't helping. Mele told me today that I'm having diarrhea because I'm wearing too loose clothes on deck and the wind is whipping up my ass and disturbing my tummy. I was howling. We have 3 Fijians onboard, Mele, Esava and Cookie - they light up my world and make Sahara and I laugh all day.
22°42.440' S x 168°55.021' E
190°
December 10
0751
Just spilt my coffee all over my lap twice in a row. Raven just walked up and saw my shorts. "Ah, so that's how today is going." Yep. The sea is the roughest yet today. White caps everywhere. No rhythmic sea, just a crazy sporadic crashing of waves enough to make the majority of the crew sick. Poor Sahara is down for the count today. You know Mele is seasick when it's cereal for breakfast. I was disappointed to hear the engine on when I woke up this morning. We were suppose to be anchored off this little island around 0530. When I came on deck around 0700 I found the little funny looking island off the stern, disappearing into the rough seas. The island was sheer cliff all around the base, then 300 feet up there were little trees and signs of life. There was no safe place to anchor that would protect us either from the sea, or the rough shores. So we continued on. Pierce had me more convinced than I'd like to admit that the reason we didn't stop there was because when we got closer they looked into the binoculars and saw men holding up spears and running up and down the beach angrily. Hey, I had just crawled out of bed and hadn't had a cup of coffee yet. We didn't even know which country the island belonged to... anything was possible..
Captain just got word on the satellite phone that a volcano in Kelly Bay New Zealand randomly erupted today - killing tourists who were climbing it! We have no idea how big of an impact the eruption had, but knowing people died is devastating. Captain is measuring the distance between swells and the direction of the wind and current, he thinks if the conditions remain the same there's a good chance we'll get an ash cloud in 4 days time. I hope that doesn't happen.
0840
ENGINE IS OFF! WE'RE SAILING BABY!
23°12.681' S x 167°42.045' E
225°
1604
I've picked up Women Who Run With The Wolves again, a book I've been carrying with me for the last few years. I don't know why I haven't read it all in one go. It hasn't always captivated me. But this time I've felt truly fascinated by it. It feels so rich and full. Like I could spend years learning from it. Finally I feel like I'm tending to my own creative fire again.
2300
I wish I could write down the coordinates but truth is we don't know them. GPS lost satellite signal a few hours ago. Our wind is shit and is coming from the exact wrong direction. We've been within the same few miles for 3 days. Opua is still 790 nautical miles away. 4 days ago it was 800. Lord have mercy. I'm so discouraged. So many times a day I find myself praying out loud that God will bring us to Nate before christmas. Cap warned me if we arrive on christmas day we won't be able to clear in, and we'll have to stay anchored without going ashore. I told him I'd be swimming at that point. The look on his face said 'No Ella'. Lord please help me stop worrying about where we are and just take these warm sunny days for what they are.
1125
The engine broke and we have no wind. Fuck.
1230
Sails are hangin like a limp tee shirt in a closet.
1400
Pierce got the engine running and the compass heading is 180°! NZ here we come! Yippee ki-yay mother fuckers.
25°13.709' S x 167°49.206' E
1400
The miles to NZ are finally decreasing. 700 to go. Should take us about 7 days if we keep the engine on or can maintain an average speed of 4 knots/hour. Which is really pretty slow anyways. It's hilarious to think that this could literally take 7 hours to drive. But it's going to take us over a week at least. Today Rob and I re rigged all the headsail halliards to make it less of a chaff shit show. We are officially out of fruit and veg, which sucks but has actually helped my stomach a lot.. maybe I just eat way too much fruit?? Today I've spent a lot of time thinking about joining the coast guard. Also about building my own sailboat. It would be so fun to live on Pender Island and either build my own or buy an old one and refit it. I've also been thinking a lot about cold beer and burritos.
26°49.04' S x 168°59.16' E
155°
1600
Today is day 10 at sea. It's another hot sunny day that I've spent entirely in my bathing suit. The watch before mine now know to give me a weather report when they wake me up at 0745, mainly just to know if I can wear my bikini or if I need a sweater too. Last night one of the pistons in our engine was misfiring, it woke me up and gave me instant anxiety. Pierce assured me it was fine, although I know it can't be good. We'll look at it more now. It's literally 64 years old.
The engine is officially off for the remainder of the trip. We have a massive oil leak in our shaft, and only enough oil onboard for about 4 more hours of motoring. Which we need to save, incase of an emergency. Looks like it's sailing from here on out. Our GPS isn't picking up a signal right now, and being curious how fast we're going, Cap told me he'll show me how to measure old school. He directed me to throw something over the bow and we'd count exactly how many seconds it took to get to the stern. It traveled the 94 ft in 18 seconds. 5.2 ft per second. With 3600 seconds in an hour and 6076 ft in a nautical mile, we know we're going 3.08 knots. Actually decent. Super cool to learn. Also at this rate we might actually be spending Christmas at sea... I really doubt it, but there IS a chance. I remember asking captain before departing Vanuatu, "should I grab some special food to set aside incase we are at sea for Christmas?" "No no no. If we're still at sea for christmas we have some serious issues or we're shipwrecked."
27°20.60' S x 169°12.28' E
155°
1014 mb
0020
The night sky is absolutely gorgeous tonight. The moon didn't rise until around 2130 - so cool - so the sky was completely free of any light. It's actually indescribable. Captain has been teaching me some celestial navigation, which I absolutely love. The moon was a burnt orange when it finally rose. I spend so many hours of my watch staring at the stars.
24 hours later, on deck looking at the stars again. Also, I've observed that the moon has been rising an hour later for every 100 nautical miles south we sail.. interesting. I wonder if that's just a coincidence. I love having so much time to think and write out here.
to change
It comes quickly in both the still and the chaotic.
I feel fine, I feel free.
Then all at once the pain demands to be felt by appearing on my cheeks.
It cries out and is important to be heard.
I sit with the change and she sits with me.
I feel panicked and shocked but she knows and she knew.
I look at the past and I look ahead.
I see beautiful things already sprouting from this tender ground.
I smile and I cry, for it is sweet but I am fragile.
I am grateful for the simplicity of the sea and how she carries me.
I sit with her and add a few salty tears of my own to the bed beneath me.
But I am well and I can see, just how precious and good this earth is to me.
No idea where we are, no idea what day it is.
0900
Fair winds and following seas! What more could you ask for! We're going 6 knots! We have all the squares out on the fore and it's absolutely beautiful! We are 300 nautical miles out from Opua too! I am beyond happy. This is really sailing now. My heart needed this to end off the trip. We should arrive in 3 days! What a beautiful end. Also Mele found another almond milk tucked away for me so I am ecstatic! Making my hot protein cereal in that instead of water makes a world of difference. I barely slept last night, laying awake rocking all night. I sat up in my bunk at 0417 and aggressively shouted FUCK, waking up to a loud crashing noise on deck. I also smacked my head something fierce. I grabbed my shorts -which were wet for some reason, so I went without- very confused and alarmed I ran up to deck to just find the watch jibing. I helped strike some sails then watched the sunrise. It was beautiful. The last days I'm never sure if I'm sleeping because I never really feel like I've just woken up...
31°32.45'S x 171°53.97' E
1730
Dec 17th?? 18th??
The Squall
Finally some rough weather. Love it. Today has been freaking fun. The winds drastically picked up while writing the previous journal entry, and instantly we were thrashing about. I ran below to make sure everything was stowed - oh BOY was it a shit show. Hopping down the hatch I found the galley, dancing about like the Burrow in Harry Potter. Boxes of cans sliding back and forth across the deck. An assortment of food and dishes rattling around on the counters. A beautiful onion rolled out from the depths behind the stove that was so beautiful I could almost have taken a bite of it raw. Did I mention we're out of all fresh veg? Oh - we're out of all fresh veg. Securing everything I made my way into the cargo hold (also my bedroom ha) and found insane amounts of books sliding across the wet floor. While picking them up I heard clashing and clamouring from the tool room - the worst room of all to be found dancing. I peaked around the corner already shielding my face with my hands. The tool room is pretty much just one huge wall stacked with boxes containing a wide range of tiny and large objects, all heavy and scary when on a starboard tack like tonight. I got a container full of screws right on my nose. Then I found the engine room - a oily slosh bucket had fell off the work bench and doused our logbook. Good thing the engine is broken and we aren't keeping track of much anyways. After well securing the ship I went back on deck and played with the sails a ton, trying to figure out the best sail figuration with this much power. We settled with the squares stowed and all the fore - aft sails raised. Safer to deal with anyways if this really does turn into a big storm. For a while today it POURED rain. Everyone ran to get their foulies but Sahara and I stripped down into our bathing suits, grabbed shampoo and showered instead. The green water pouring over the gun wales provided a perfect sea bath for me. I literally laid down on the deck and was covered - it was beautiful. I'm about to head up for my evening watch.. I'm dreading it. I wish I had warm clothing. This is your reminder to buy foulies BEFORE the next passage Ella. What I wouldn't give to just go lay in my bunk instead of stand in the pouring rain and wind for the next 4 hours. OR NO - even better - oh my gosh I wish I could lay in a warm bath. I'm heating up some water to fill my water bottle - I've been keeping that in my shirt on these cold night watches. I'm honestly surprised no one was fallen overboard these past hours - its so rough. And there is absolutely no chance you'd get found either if that happened now. Lord have mercy.
32°25.76' S x 173°01.99' E
0020
The calm after the storm.
We've been drifting for the last 24 hours. We've gone 3 miles. Most of that has seriously been backwards. Theres no wind. Today is 2 weeks at sea. We've been eating potatoes every day for a few days now. Today Sahara said "I feel like I was born on this ship." I couldn't agree more. Call me dramatic but sometimes I feel like this ship is all I've ever known and all I'll ever know. Raven keeps repeating I don't think we'll ever reach land. HAHA. Opua sits 150 nautical miles away. We're SO close, yet New Zealand feels further than ever. I totally thought the end was near. But now with this dead calm sea and absolutely no engine, we're fully at the mercy of God and the sea. Captain told me today, "You're religious right? Pray to your God and ask him for wind."
33°24.25' S x 173°41.40' E
1413
WIND AND 180° !!!!!!
My God you are GOOD! Thank you for wind! In the perfect direction too! We are heading due south to Opua and averaging 5 knots!! It looks like we'll arrive tomorrow evening!! AMAZING. We are now 101 nautical miles away. We are also suppose to get a bad storm directly from the south this morning at 0000 though.. so we'll see what to do when that hits. It's a real bummer this old lady doesn't tack better... so interesting. Jibing is tiring for us and her. For now we're making great headway and putting decent amounts of miles behind us. Praise God. Lord knows I am so tired of eating rice and lentils. Last night my watch was pretty much four hours of jibing back and forth. I actually loved it though. The phosphoresce has been out of this world this whole voyage. And the stars - oh my! I was originally disappointed getting placed on the 8-12 watch but I am enjoying it immensely. I am so grateful for this adventure. I am so grateful for a God who knows me and loves me. Who creates exciting adventures to fill my soul and journals. You are one wild God. It's such a joy to be dancing through these crazy years with you. Help me hold onto everything loosely and keep it in your hands!
33°07.273'S x 174°10.88'E
105°
1400
It seems exciting winds go as quickly as they come. We had an exciting storm last night that gave us a few hours of 6 knots. Now we've spent the last 12 hours drifting at less than one. Damn. We're only 50 miles from Opua but at this rate and wind direction it could still very well take days. I just woke up from a horrible night mare of a shooting back in Abby. It's so scary sometimes to not be able to connect with home at all, I can get quite scared if I let myself think about something terrible happening. Then there's really nothing I can do but give it to God and trust he's in control. I came into the galley to find everyone quietly disappointed with the small amount of lunch set out. Liam just asked if he could make some bread - but after a while of stammering Mele gently asked him if he could wait until we arrive, just so she can properly ration everything. He replied kindly yet I can see he's just hungry and done. I actually can't believe our situation. We ran out of all food but beans and rice. This is insane. Dinner will be dhal and roti again. Good thing I actually love that meal so much. It is getting a little bland now that there's no canned veg. We're about to run out of oil too, so this will probably be our last batch of roti. This is crazy. It's so not fun. I miss eating healthy so badly. I'm now forced to eat cake and rice several meals a day. At least the canned meat is gone, that was so gross.
1755
Day 18 or 19 at sea? Too lazy to go write down the coordinates but I'm sure they aren't noticeably different from my last reading anyways. I just woke up from a nice nap AND I found a rare peppermint teabag in the bottom of the tea drawer. As well as a chocolate! Damn I'm a lucky girl.
1433
Devastation Situation. I broke the steering. We're now completely fucked. Okay we're not actually screwed, we've figured it out. But it was bad. Must have been around 2300. I was on the helm. I promise this had nothing to do with me... but the steering gear pivot pin sheared right off... leaving the helm in my hands...not attached to the rudder. Exactly what you want after weeks at sea with hungry sleep deprived crew. We spent the rest of my watch installing emergency steering gear. I'm falling asleep laughing but I KNOW I'll cry when I wake up.
0910
I don't know how I knew. The tears came before I even left my bunk. I could tell by the sound of the water lapping against the hull outside my bunk that we were barely moving. We have no wind. We have no engine. We have shit food left. We now have fucked up steering. Tomorrow is Christmas Eve. Nate leaves for the airport in a few hours. I think I totally thought we would make it in time. But it hit me this morning that we really won't. Captain let me have one minute on the satellite phone this morning.. I dialled Nate's number as Captain told me to wipe away the tears and make it brief. He didn't pick up. Honestly probably better this way. I wanted to call him to tell him we won't be there by christmas and that I was so sorry. But by not coming online he would know anyways. God I pray you would see me and find me in this little boat out at sea and somehow make our christmas really special. Nate's too.
1720
Reading Women Who Run With The Wolves. Absolutely love this.
"Afeared or not, it is an act of deepest love to allow oneself to be stirred by the wildish soul of another. In a world where humans are so afraid of "loosing", there are far too many protective walls against being dissolved in the numinosity of another human soul."
32°28.71' S x 173°55.94' E
1015
42 miles to go
It's Christmas Eve. I really can't believe we're still out here. I didn't think this would actually happen. We had rice for breakfast this morning. Will probably be lunch and dinner too. There is absolutely no wind at all today. It must be close to 40°C. We've been drifting all morning.
1930
38 miles to go
I got to call Nate!! Captain got one bar of service on his phone and suggested I call him. I refused the offer because Nate is in New Zealand now, and his phone would be on airplane mode. He said just give it a shot. I dialled in his number fully not expecting to hear his voice on the other end. They might deny this but I swear the whole crew sneakily gathered within ear shot and smiled for the 3 minutes I gushed and giggled onto the phone. I warned Nate we might not be able to clear in if we arrive tomorrow on Christmas, so if you see us anchored with our yellow quarantine flag up, you know we're good but won't be coming ashore until the following morning. He had similar thoughts to me. "Oh theres no way I'm not just swimming out to you if that's the case!" "No Nate you can't swim!!!" "Oh I'm definitely going to swim!" *Captain grabs the phone and tells Nate just how serious it is that no one comes onboard until we've been cleared in.* It was so exciting to hear his voice. I wished him a merry christmas and told him I'd see him soon. Our Christmas Eve onboard was actually magical. The fact that we were drifting and it was dead calm was somehow special, for everyone just hung out on deck in the warm sun. Everyone either napped on deck or pulled what we like to joke as an "all day-er" where we don't sleep between watches. It felt special to have everyone up and around. In the afternoon we put on the generator and watched 'Around Cape Horn' at the aft, complete with one small bowl of popcorn!! (Mele let me save a little bit of oil a while ago incase we were truly out here for Christmas.) Everyone was in a good mood. All us girls showered and did laundry. All the colourful clothing hanging around the deck felt like christmas decorations. I pulled out the baggy wrinkles and convinced everyone to take a group picture in them. It turned into a big hula dance party and tons of laughter. Then Liam jumped into the water with a tow line around his waist and attempted to pull us - HAHA now you really get the idea of how little we're moving. He didn't manage to move us but he did catch a Kingfish! So Christmas Eve's dhal dinner was complete with some fish chunks in it! I literally ate Christmas Eve dinner alone. Most of the crew ate before me while I was up on the fore mast furling the square's for the night. I laughed eating my fish soup imagining my family having fondu and wine and sitting around chatting for hours by the tree. Felt like crying. We didn't even have a tree. Now it's time to go up for my watch and sit in the freezing cold for 4 hours.. This is hilarious.
0012
Falling asleep with 30 miles to go. New Zealand looks so close. I saw the first lighthouse beacon shinning from the entrance to Opua. I can't wait to arrive. I wonder where Beth and Adam are today. Merry Christmas I guess!
34°52.71'S x 174°11.38'E
1037
Christmas 2019
I woke up at 0600 this morning and could again tell that we weren't going anywhere quick by the sound of the water. I pulled out two bars of chocolate that I have no idea how I managed to save, but had been for this exact occasion, and wrapped them in an old chart. I wrote a letter to sahara on the inside of one and put it on her pillow. I wrote "merry christmas ya fucker" on the outside of the other, and left it on mine. Desperate times. I went up on deck to find my girl and wish her a big Merry Christmas. At this point I figured we are already stuck out here, mise well laugh at literally everything dumb and make it a fun day. I found a can of sweetened condensed milk and had been saving it for our coffee this morning. So good!! I didn't think I could eat rice for one more breakfast - especially not Christmas, so Sahara and I went into the galley and threw insanely weird things into a bowl, baked em up and called them cookies. I honestly don't even know how to convince you that these were literally the best cookies I've ever made. Maybe because we've been eating so blandly lately, I DONT KNOW, but these were seriously heavenly. I even topped them off with fresh sea salt I harvested from the deck haha. They turned out perfectly. I'll be sure to try cooking them on land some time and see if they are completely disgusting. Recipe to follow. Anyways, we are 17 nautical miles away! The wind is very light and I'm scared it will back off throughout the afternoon like it has been lately, but if NOT, we should be there tonight!!!!
35°31.30' S x 174°11.27' E
1600
22 days at sea
We arrived into the channel mid afternoon and anchored 3 miles off from Opua late at night last night. Christmas dinner was a bizarre feast of literally every leftover weird food we had onboard. It was beautiful. Mele was an absolute champ, making do with very little ingredients these last few weeks. We spent christmas evening playing Sahara and I's homemade version of code names. It was a very interesting christmas but definitely one I will always remember. Sailing through the channel passing beautiful islands and charming seaside villages in the bright morning sun felt like a welcome home parade. I hoped Nate was somewhere on shore watching us. Little did I know he was, and was also swimming and sprinting for an hour just to arrive to the Opua customs dock by the time we did. Literally just as we threw on the mooring lines I saw him sprinting up the wharf. I jumped up and down squealing. He later told me he breathed out a sigh of relief when he saw me jumping - knowing then that I did still like him and was happy to see him. New Zealand; we've finally arrived and oh how sweet it is.
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